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Joe
2001-05-03 @ 5:51 p.m.

I had this dream about Joe the other night that was like the kind of dream people have in books or movies but you never really expect to have in real life. He and I were at work, and he looked exactly like he did in real life. We were just working, sort of closing up together, not talking too much. We were just sort of pretending everything was normal. Finally, we were the last ones in the building, counting the cash drawer and stuff, and I turned to him and was just like, "I have to tell you this, Joe, you're going to die." And he was like, "Darling, I'm already dead, I'm just here to work with you one last time and say good-bye." I started crying like crazy and we stood and hugged for the longest time, him just comforting me as I cried and told him how glad I was to see him and how much I missed him so goddamn much. I don't know if he said it out loud or if he just let me know that it was okay, it was all okay now. We sat down and were just looking at each other, holding hands and talking, I don't know what about. At one point I asked him why he did it, and he just said, "I don't really want to talk about it," and I was like, "Okay, no prob." I don't really remember what happened after that, we had to finish closing and my ride was coming to get me, but I told him, "I'm so glad we had this last chance to work together and see each other again."

I woke up just feeling like he had really come to say good-bye.

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